I am done. As of 6:00 this morning, I finished editing the last sentence. I knew I was done when I found myself spending a great bulk of time editing one letter in one word repeatedly. The last sentence is (and you will not get this out of context), "I drew pictures of myself." In my early-morning-up-since-three-not-enough-coffee-overediting-to-a-fault haze I couldn't decide if the sentence should be past or present tense. So I kept changing my mind and agonizing over literally one letter that would change "I drew pictures of myself" to "I draw pictures of myself." Finally I decided two things: 1) since the entire book was in past tense it made no sense to traumatize the reader with a present tense verb out of nowhere, and 2) I was seriously overediting. I also decided that it was time for another cup of coffee.
So there it is, children. Off to Agent Sarah! May she be kind. May she read it and say, "You, Genevieve, are done. This is a master piece. And that past tense verb at the end seals the deal. Here is a publisher, an ungodly advance, and a Starbucks gift card."
So what else is going on with me? I'm happy to start writing something else now, for one thing. The kids and I have been reading the Junie B. Jones series the last two evenings and having a great time. I have the absence of cabel television to thank for that. How am I romantically? Financially? Emotionally? My appetite, blood sugar level, and heart rate? Well, I have a storage bin of disposable lovers, money to burn, happiness aplenty, and the constitution and the body of a goddess. That's my official statement, which I have filed away and am prepared to deliver at the next family gathering I attend, where 50 people will all come up and ask how I'm holding together. And then when they walk away I will turn around and bang my head on their living room wall repeatedly.
But atleast the next time someone asks me about the book I will be able to say that it's in my agent's hands now. That I feel throughout my soul that it is truly done, no more changes. Right, Agent Sarah? Right? Pretty please? With Splenda on top? Yeah, that's what I thought.